Your Terracotta Moment | San Diego Therapy

Have you ever repotted a plant?
It’s an odd little ritual.

Sometimes the roots slip right out—clean, easy, cooperative.
But other times, the plant’s withered fingers grasp the pot’s interior for dear life. You must pre-water the soil, pry gently along the edges, coaxing it loose. Eventually, you cup the plant’s wispy buttocks and lift—presenting it to the world like a baby Simba. (At least, that’s how I do it.)

The contrast is apparent.
Above soil: vibrant greenery, stretching toward the light.
Below: a web of roots, tangled and clumped dusty computer cables.
The plant looks alive and wants to expand, but there’s literally no room for growth. It’s been stuck—unable to grow—perhaps for a long time.

anxiety, attachment, Boundaries, consciousness, couples therapy, internal family systems, identity, San Diego Couples Therapy, spiral dynamics, self-talk, self-esteem, trauma, san diego therapy, north county therapyDan LoneyFebruary 17, 2026San Diego Individual Therapy, therapy for men in san diego, san diego therapy

Take the Confusion Out of Relationships | Couples Therapy San Diego

We are living in an age of poor values, capricious words, and large egos. People aren’t as sure as to what they stand for, therefore, there’s no wonder there’s an incongruence between words and actions. With a lack of character, you know how people are defining themselves?

INTENTIONS.

Most of the time, these intentions are good as well. However, how many times have you become harmed by someone’s “good” intentions?

So what do you do? In a crazy age, how do you take the confusion out of relationships? It’s actually pretty simple: just look at actions.

couples therapy, internal family systems, north county therapy, relationships, San Diego Couples Therapy, san diego therapy, schema therapy, self-esteem, self-talk, spiral dynamics, EFTDan LoneySeptember 28, 2019

Social Media and Relationships | Couples Therapy San Diego

In this blog, I’m going to give you some perspective on how social media is subtly changing us individually and relationally, as well as a few healthy steps we can take in these changing times.

First, for some perspective.

Did you know that with each notification ping, flash, and buzz, the feel-good chemical of dopamine is released in your brain? Dopamine is a reward signaling that we’ve accomplished something. It helps us relax. It’s why social media is addictive; we are not accomplishing anything and receiving the good effects of it. This isn’t by accident—each part of social media has been programmed to make you stick around.

relationships, identity, Boundaries, couples therapy, consciousness, dating, EFT, north county therapy, internal family systems, San Diego Couples Therapy, unstuck, self-esteemDan LoneyAugust 21, 2019social mediaComment

How to Set Healthy Boundaries - Part II (Identity) | San Diego Therapy

Boundaries and identity complement one another. Better knowing yourself allows you to set healthily boundaries; setting healthier boundaries allows you to know your true self.

· Decreased stress and insecurity

· Increased energy and confidence

Boundaries, attachment, consciousness, couples therapy, Personality Disorders, north county therapy, internal family systems, identity, san diego therapy, San Diego Couples Therapy, schema therapy, spiral dynamics, unstuck, self-talkDan LoneyMay 19, 2019

How to Set Healthy Boundaries – Part 1 (Awareness) | Therapy in San Diego

When asking a couple what they want to achieve in therapy, you know what the #1 answer is? Communication. It’s often said, “This person never communicates to me.” But here’s the thing. We’re always communicating. Always.

The text you don’t send; the eye contact you’ve chosen to avoid; the time you choose to not express your thoughts. That’s all a message that you’re communicating to someone else.

Boundaries, consciousness, attachment, anxiety, couples therapy, internal family systems, north county therapy, Personality Disorders, San Diego Couples Therapy, schema therapy, spiral dynamics, self-talk, self-esteem, traumaDan LoneyMay 2, 2019boundaries

3 Steps To Building Your Identity | Therapy in San Diego

In my previous blog, I said that it’s vital that you have a vision of your true identity. And while I’d never shoot down your lunar dreams, I also want to do a caution with identity. It’s completely human to set unrealistic goals for yourself. So as you begin to hone in on experiencing your authentic identity, I want to give you tips. You’ve got to keep things, 1) small, 2) consistent, and 3) sustainable.

These words are not sexy.

I get it.

anxiety, attachment, Boundaries, consciousness, couples therapy, north county therapy, internal family systems, San Diego Couples Therapy, Personality Disorders, san diego therapy, schema therapy, self-esteem, schema, self-talk, spiral dynamicsDan LoneyMarch 9, 2019

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